In 2019 I first learned about Human Design. Casting a free chart on Jovian Archive I learned I was a Generator—the most common of the 5 Types (Generator, Projector, Reflector, Manifestor, & Manifesting Generator) and my strategy for moving through the world is to wait to respond to things, not to initiate them. Manifesting Generator's also share the same wait to respond strategy. This blew my mind. I was 36 years old when someone finally told me that initiating projects, relationships, friendships, etc would almost always lead to frustration. And it indeed had.
It was so simple. If you have a gut feeling of being lit up by something it's a YES for you to pursue, if you find yourself trying to justify it in your head with no clear resolution and feel frustrated its a NO.
At the time there wasn't a lot of information on HD yet, but I did a deep dive on my chart because I was peak frustration about my work, my relationship and how I'd been living life since leaving my hairstyling career in 2016 to pursue tarot and astrology full time. That summer I quietly started an experiment in responding to what was immediately presenting itself in my environment, rather than seeking things to respond to.
For example, when life felt boring and I was craving excitement—something delicious to dive into, in the past I would go online and endlessly scroll for inspiration, something that would spark my creativity, give me an idea of what to post about, what to research, etc. It wasn't (and still isn't) easy to close my phone and remind myself that everything I need to respond to is right in my eye line, I don't need to go searching.
Being a Generator with Sacral authority means I need to feel lit up and for lack of a better way to describe it, turned on by things and trust my gut to make sure I'll have sustainable energy for whatever comes my way, and to really listen to my body's internal groan of ugh I could do this, but it doesn't excite me, and say no to those things.
I put it to the test that summer and the results were astounding. I suddenly realized how many things I was saying yes to that I had zero desire to do, just because I was afraid of disappointing people if I said no. I feared rejection for choosing myself. I also learned this is textbook co-dependency, I'm so grateful that Human Design helped me see how codependent I was. If this is you, I cannot recommend The Sugar Jar by Yasmine Cheyenne enough for healing co-dependency. I had the opportunity to take a class with her that same year and it was life changing!
There is a real fear that when you stop saying yes to opportunities there is a possibility that the well will dry up. What if no one comes to me for anything? If I stop initiating and chasing my dreams won't I succumb to inertia and nothing will ever happen? If I stop trying to make people like me, how will I ever be noticed? These were some biggies for me.
The caveat here isn't to stop participating in life and sit on your ass and wait for things to show up. It's to stop pushing your agenda for a beat and quietly ask your body (not your brain) what would feel most fun and satisfying today? When you stop looking toward the horizon and start noticing what's right in front of you, you'll regain a sense of control by dealing with the little tasks you've been ignoring because they don't seem to matter as much as your bigger, juicier goals and dreams. But dealing with these little things like answering emails and texts (that usually involve saying no because if they were yeses, you'd respond right away) dealing with the pile of laundry that needs to be folded and put away, making that return or reading that book that's been sitting on your nightstand for months—this is how you turn your generator motor on and find your way back to satisfaction and using your energy in sustainable ways that benefit you, not necessarily anyone else.
This is when things got juicy. I stopped initiating the things that my brain was telling me I should be doing to increase my clients, scale my business and make more money. During those quiet moments of going back to the gym, taking care of the clutter in my apartment and spending more time in Prospect Park than on the couch scrolling IG comparing myself to everyone else, I received my first (out of the blue it felt) offer from a French publisher to translate Moon Void Tarot and publish a French language version. They said I had to write a guidebook though. Even though I'd created Moon Void and been selling it for a year, I didn't have a guidebook. The overwhelm of not knowing how to or where to begin had kept me frozen for an entire year, buuuuuut the second I was asked to write one and offered thousands of dollars to do it, I sat down and wrote it in two weeks. TWO WEEKS. That is how powerful a generator's motor is when they are doing something they're really excited about. Also, the thing that seemed to be for my benefit actually benefited everyone. That first guidebook led to several tarot publications, including best-selling, Guided Tarot
This is how every significant relationship or career opportunity has played out for me, even before I knew about HD. The formula has always been, stop chasing the things you want and let them come to you naturally. While you're waiting, focus your energy on things that excite you and make you happy. Romanticize your life, live it now and passionately without hesitation. That's when the good shit can find you. Doesn't this sound an awful lot like basic manifestation? Everything is connected.
Every modality serves a purpose. I turn to tarot most often because it helps me make decisions by listening to my body instead of my brain. I follow astrology to help me relax and trust the timing and cycles of growth and rest that are specific to me. Human Design has taught me how to make moves or say no based on my energy type.
When something isn't working, I'm reminded to simplify things by going back to the basic strategy of my Generator design to wait to respond.
If you're curious about learning how to work with your Human Design, these are my two favorite beginner books:
Understanding Human Design, by Karen Parker
Human Design: The Revolutionary System That Shows You Who You Came Here To Be, by Jenna Zoe
I'm also adding Aycee Brown's new book that incorporates Human Design, Astrology, Numerology and Mediumship. at the time of this post I have not yet read it, but it is top of my wishlist!
Embody Your Magic, by Aycee Brown
I will make a separate post about what I learned from my 5/1 profile type. Spoiler, it's completely different than what being a Generator taught me!